Top Tips on How to Write a Maid of Honor speech
So you need to write a Maid of Honor Speech
Congratulations! You've been asked to be the Maid of Honor at your friend's wedding, and you couldn't be more excited. You've been planning the bachelorette party for years now and are eager to go dress shopping. As you delve into the world of wedding planning, you start to think about the other aspects of being a Maid of Honor and what this role entails when you realize that one of the Maid of Honor's duties means giving the perfect speech at the wedding reception. She is your best friend, and you love her so much, but how on earth are you supposed to even know where to start when it comes to giving a wedding speech? I mean, you've never even given a speech before! Isn't there a statistic out there that says the number one fear that people have is public speaking? You thought that was a little dramatic, but now you're starting to understand.
This Maid of Honor thing is starting to feel really stressful!
Relax! Grab a pen, and let's get those creative juices flowing with these Maid of Honor speech tips. These tips will show you how to write a Maid of Honor speech that is heartfelt and memorable, that both the bride and the wedding guests are sure to love.
Maid of Honor Speech Outline
Although every Maid of Honor Speech will be different here is a Maid of Honor speech template that will help give you an idea of where to start.
1. Start by introducing yourself and thanking everyone for being there and for supporting the bride on her wedding day
Make sure to briefly introduce yourself, as not everyone may know who you are. Are you the bride's sister? Best friend of 20 years? The wedding guests will appreciate at least knowing your name before you give your speech.
Take a moment to thank everyone for being there, and let them know how much it means to you and your friend. Thanking everyone for being there is a great way to make the wedding guests feel included. After all, it's because of them that your friend has such an amazing support system on her big day.
2. Talk about how you met your friend and some of the great memories you have together
Did you meet when you were six at horse camp and she complimented your "My Little Pony" shirt? Or maybe she was your college roommate? Talking about how you first met your friend and sharing some of the great memories you have together is a great way to build up the rest of your speech.
This wedding toast is an excellent opportunity to reminisce on the good times, like all the late nights spent singing Taylor Swift loudly and out of tune. (You're still surprised that the neighbors never complained.) Take a moment to appreciate the fact that she's been there for you for a big chunk of your lifIt's also a great time to throw in any funny stories, like the time she broke through your bathroom window to check in on you because she thought you were dead. (One of the personal anecdotes I used in my own Maid of Honor speech for my best friend this last January)
3. Share why she is such a special person and what she means to you
Sharing why your friend is such a special person and what she means to you is a great way to get emotional in your speech. This section of your speech is the perfect opportunity to tell her how much she means to you, and why she is such an important part of your life.
What are some qualities you love most about her? What makes her such a great friend? Is she always down to drink wine and watch True Crime documentaries with you? Is she sweet and compassionate? Would she save a litter of puppies from a burning building? Has she saved a litter of puppies from a burning building? Take this opportunity to sing her praises.
4. Tell a funny or poignant story about your friend that will leave everyone in stitches (or with tears in their eyes)
Telling a funny or poignant story about your friend is a great way to get the crowd laughing (or crying). This is your chance to show off her personality to everyone. Did she once try to dye her hair blonde and it turned out green? Or maybe she has overcome many obstacles on her way to becoming the badass lady you see before you. As long as the story is appropriate for the occasion, this is your chance to share it with the world.
5. Talk about her partner and what makes them such a perfect person for her
Talking about her life partner and what makes them such a perfect person for her is a great way to round out your speech. This is your chance to gush about how wonderful they are and why you think they are such a great match for your best friend. You've been there for all the former boyfriends, so why are you happy this one made the cut?
What is their love story? What are some of the things you love most about them? Do they make her laugh until she cries? Are they always there for her when she needs them? This is your chance to tell the world why they make such a great team.
6. Conclude the speech with a toast while also offering a little advice
Concluding the speech by saying how happy you are for your friend and wishing them all the best is a great way to wrap things up. It's a chance for you to reiterate how proud you are of her, and to tell her that you can't wait to see what the future holds for her.
This is also a great opportunity to offer any parting wisdom if you have any. If you're having trouble coming up with something other than "Happy wife, happy life," then you can always use a quote from one of the pros, such as “A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.” – Mignon McLaughlin
7. Read your speech out loud to a friend or in front of a mirror
Practice your speech and time yourself! When people get nervous, they tend to speak quickly, so you want to make sure that you take a second to breathe and speak slowly. It's also a good opportunity to check out your facial expressions. You don't want to be doing anything too crazy, but you definitely don't want to look like a statue.
Ask your friend if you should change anything or check out your body language in the mirror. It's also perfectly normal to feel nervous butterflies in your stomach so you want to make sure you practice in front of at least one person, so it won't be as scary when you feel them for the first time on the wedding day.
What NOT to say in your Maid of Honor speech
Now that we've gotten the Dos out of the way, let's talk about what not to say in your Maid of Honor speech.
1. Don't mention any past drama or disagreements between you and your friend
Bringing up old drama is a surefire way to ruin the mood and make everyone uncomfortable. This is not the time to speak badly about her partner or their relationship, as this is definitely a no-no. If you have any negative feelings, keep them to yourself.
2. Don't monopolize the microphone
You're most likely not going to be the only one giving a wedding speech, so make sure you're not holding onto the microphone for more than 5 minutes. You don't want the wedding guests to get antsy during your speech and then hand the microphone off to the Best Man.
3. Don't use too many inside jokes
While it's great to have a few inside jokes with your friend, you don't want the entire speech to be filled with them. Not everyone at the wedding will know what you're talking about, and they'll just be sitting there feeling left out. Save the inside jokes for when you're catching up with her privately.
4. Don't talk badly about her ex-boyfriends
Even if you think her ex-boyfriends were all terrible, it's not appropriate to talk about them while giving your Maid of Honor speech. This is her day, and she doesn't need to be reminded of any of her past relationships. Save the dirty details for the bar after the wedding.
5. Don't talk about anything you know would be inappropriate
Those drunken nights spent at the bar may be the highlight of your time together at college, but her family members might not find it as funny. When in doubt it's best to keep it family-friendly.
6. Don't make jokes at her expense
Even if you think they're hilarious, making jokes about your friend's looks or weight is not appropriate for your Maid of Honor speech. (Arguably, it's never appropriate but ESPECIALLY on her wedding day)
7. Don't stay glued to your phone or paper
Not only will it make you look unprepared, but it will also make it seem like you didn't practice your Maid of Honor speech. If you're feeling nervous, it's better to memorize your speech instead of relying on notes; however, if having notes will make you feel better, then it's better to have a speech outline than to have the speech written down exactly. This way, if you get lost or forget something, you can just glance down to get back on track instead of relying on your paper completely.
8. Don't get too emotional
While it's okay to get a little emotional, you don't want to start crying uncontrollably. The last thing you want is for the bride to have to comfort you in front of all her friends and family, and not even finish the speech that you worked so hard on!
Maid of Honor Speech FAQ
How long should my speech be?
Keeping it short and sweet is definitely the move here! The sweet spot is between 2-5 minutes.
When should I start writing my speech?
The earlier, the better! You don't want to start writing the night before, or even worse, the morning of, and let that stress go
to your head. Ideally, you want to start as soon as possible or at the very least give yourself a few weeks to edit and practice your speech.
Here are some Maid of Honor speech examples to help inspire you!
"Hi everyone! My name is Sarah, and I am Olivia’s best friend and Maid of Honor. I first met Olivia when we were 13 years old during Ms. Allen’s English class. Olivia had just moved to town, was new in school, and immediately became the center of everyone’s attention. But who could blame them? She was as funny and charismatic then as she is now. So then you can imagine my surprise when she made a beeline for the desk next to mine and promptly introduced herself to me. Everyone wanted to be her friend, and I was confused as to why she picked me, of all people, to sit down next to. But I’m so glad she did because now, more than ten years later, she’s still my best friend and I can’t imagine my life without her.
"She is kind and spontaneous and constantly pushes people to be the best version of themself. In high school, I had a secret passion for photography but was always too afraid of rejection to do anything about it. One day Olivia submitted one of my photographs to a local competition. I was furious with her until I found out that I’d won! She gave me that dazzling Olivia smile and told me she just knew that I would. She can be frustrating when she’s right, as I’m sure Mark knows. I’m now a professional photographer, and I have her to thank for giving me that initial push.
"I am so happy that I get to stand by her side as she begins her life with her wonderful new husband, and I wish them both nothing but the very best. Here’s to a long and happy marriage!" -Sarah
"Good evening and welcome everyone. As some of you may already know, my name is Lucy, and I'm Grace's little sister. On behalf of Grace and our parents, I'd like to thank you all for being here today. Many of you had to travel from far away, and it means so much that we get to celebrate this happy day with all of you. I've known Grace my entire life, but she got to have 5 blissfully peaceful years with just our parents before I came along. I know she was upset about my birth at the time, but I like to think that I've worn her down over the years into begrudgingly liking me.
"I'm just teasing her; Grace was the best big sister I ever could have asked for. She taught me everything I know and always encouraged me to be better than I was the day before. I know it could have been easy for her to be annoyed by me; after all, I was the little sister that was always trying to tag along with her and her cool older friends, but she was always so kind to me. I remember being heartbroken when I was 13, and she moved away for college. She was not only my sister but also my best friend. Who would I go to for advice? Who was going to help me with my makeup for school dances? Worst of all: whose closet would I raid now that Grace had taken all her good clothes with her? Turns out I didn't have to worry too much because she was always one phone call away, and she always answered no matter what.
"During one of those phone calls, she told me about this super cute guy she'd met at the library. He was sweet and funny and had asked her out for coffee that weekend. That super cute and funny guy was none other than David, and I couldn't be happier for Grace and him. From the moment I met him, he immediately treated me like family. He became the big brother I never knew I wanted, but I am so glad I have. I can't wait to see the life the two of them build together, and I wish them a lifetime of love and happiness!" -Lucy
"Hello and welcome, everyone! I'm Carmen, and Emma and I were college roommates together at BU. When I first met Emma, she was sitting on the floor of our dorm room reading a book. She hadn't even started unpacking. We introduced ourselves, and when I asked her how long she'd been here, she said, "Oh, not long, only 3 hours." And if you know how Emma gets when she has her nose in a book, then yes, 3 hours isn't long at all. I asked her why she hadn't started unpacking, and she said it was because I wasn't here yet, so how was she supposed to know what side of the room I wanted? It was quite possibly the sweetest and most considerate thing anyone has ever done for me. I grew up with two older brothers and a younger sister, so I'd never heard the words what do you want before that day. You had to take what you wanted back home before it was taken from you. But Emma was just so thoughtful and kind. We quickly became best friends, and she was my lighthouse through all the late-night study sessions and existential dread that came with thinking about life after college.
"Emma met James our Sophomore year at a party. It was love at first sight, and they immediately became a serious couple. I was a little hesitant at first; who could possibly be good enough for Emma? But the more I got to know James, the more confident I became that there would never be anyone more perfect for her than him. Our friends used to call them Mom and Dad because that's how solid they are. I always knew they would get their "Happily Ever After" because if anyone deserves it, it's these two.
"Here's to Emma and James! May your marriage be very long and very happy indeed. Cheers! "-Carmen
When in doubt hire a professional!
No matter how well you know your friend, writing a maid of honor speech can be tough. If you're feeling overwhelmed or just don't have the time to write something yourself, consider hiring a professional speechwriter to help you out. Here at Tailored Wedding Speeches, our mission is to help you craft the perfect maid of honor speech for the wedding day, so
that you can relax and focus on what really matters: having fun with your bestie on one of the happiest days of her life.